You think Trump is weird, some of our past presidents were even weirder.
Let’s start with Aaron Burr, vice president to Thomas Jefferson. He was a real nut case. He didn’t like what Alexander Hamilton wrote about him in the paper so he challenged him to a duel and shot him. Hamilton is on your 10 dollar bill.
In a fit of wackiness, Burr got a gang of outlaws together and rode off to take over a part of Louisiana and Texas, to be the emperor of his own kingdom.
Thomas Jefferson, our third president, was an international smuggler. When he was a diplomat to Italy he went there and stole a bag of valuable rice seeds from that country. He hid them in a pocket and snuck them into America and started the rice industry. He was a smuggler, slave-owner and womanizer.
Mild-mannered President Jimmy Carter was fishing one morning and claimed a giant swimming rabbit jumped in his boat and attacked him. OK Jimmy, we believe you. He also saw a UFO. I think he ate one too many peanuts.
Present Ronald Reagan saw a UFO. He was flying in Air Force One and looked out the window and saw a shining light cruising next to the plane. He told the pilot to chase the UFO. There, there, Ronald, have another jelly bean.
It was rather weird for Richard Nixon to hire prowlers to break into the Watergate Hotel to spy on the Democrats. Tricky Dick told us he was not a crook, but he was.
And bad boy Donald Trump with his mistress, Stormy Daniels, but many of our most revered presidents had their own Stormy Daniels on the side.
Say it isn’t so, but even George Washington had an extra girlfriend. Thomas Jefferson’s fling with a slave girl is well known. Warren Harding met his mistress in the White House, and FDR and Eisenhower had a secret lady friend.
JFK was a womanizer, and Bill Clinton had Monica Lewinsky. So let’s give Donald a break with Stormy Daniels. He just wanted to be one of the boys.
We are shocked by Trump’s racist rants against minorities, but he’s a nice, tolerant liberal compared to earlier presidents.
The great liberator Abraham Lincoln wanted to send Blacks to colonies in Africa.
President Garfield was a real peach. He said, “I feel repugnance when I think of the negro, they should be sent to Heaven or got rid of.”
President Woodrow Wilson supported a bill to sterilize homeless people. LBJ and President Truman used the N-word in public all the time.
No matter how bad Trump is, there’s always someone worse, if that’s possible.
People with an IQ of 120 and above are completely baffled that seemingly normal people want that idiotic buffoon as our president. There’s a sucker born every minute.
What a country we live in, where crooks and felons can be president and the Reverend Martin Luther King is thrown in jail.
Dennis Gregory writes a bi-monthly column in West Hawaii Today and welcomes your comments at makewavess@yahoo.com.
