Looking for ways to stay in shape? Begin with a 5-pound potato bag in each hand. Extend your arms straight out from your sides, hold them there for a full minute, and then relax and breathe. After a week of this, move up to a 10-pound potato bag. Then try 50-pound potato bags, and eventually get to where you can lift a 100-pound potato bag in each hand. Once you feel confident at that level, put a potato in each bag! (Yep, doctor knows best and wants you to be healthy!)
One more from da doc? Due to a job transfer, Brian moved from his hometown to New York. He brought his comprehensive health history, as he had some heath issues. When it came time for his first checkup with his new doctor, he presented him with all his medical paperwork. After browsing through the extensive medical history, the doctor stared at Brian for a few moments and said, “Well there’s one thing I can say for certain, you sure look better in person than you do on paper!”
This one is short but important! Some days you eat salads and go to the gym. Some days you eat 15 tacos and drink margaritas. It’s called balance!
Another “shorty?” Forgive your enemies! It messes with their heads!
To prepare you for Mother’s Day, here is a great LOL. Over breakfast one morning, a woman says to her husband, “I bet you don’t know what day this is!” “Of course I do,” he indignantly answered, going out the door to work! At 10 a.m., the doorbell rang and when the woman opens the door, she is handed a box of a dozen long-stemmed red roses. At 1 p.m. a foil-wrapped, two-pound box of her favorite chocolates arrive! Later, a boutique delivers a designer dress to her front door. The woman couldn’t wait for her husband to come home. Entering the front door she exclaims to him, “First the flowers, then the candy and then the dress! I’ve never spent a more wonderful Groundhog Day in my whole life!”
A famous art collector is walking in his city when he notices a mangy cat lapping up milk from a saucer at the doorway of a store. He does a double take when noticing that the saucer is very old and very valuable. So, he casually walks into the store and offers to buy the cat for $2. The store owner replies, “I’m sorry, but the cat isn’t for sale.” The collector says, “Please, I need a hungry cat around my house to catch mice. I’ll pay you $20 for that cat!” And then the owner says, “Sold”, and hands him the cat. The collector continues, ”Hey, for $20 I wonder if you could throw in that old saucer. The cat has used it and it will save me from having to get a dish for him.” The the owner responds, “Sorry buddy, but that’s my lucky saucer. So far this week, I’ve sold 38 cats!”
Knowledge is a gift, so here is my gift this week: Students in an advanced human biology class were taking midterm exams. The last question was “Name seven advantages of mother’s milk. The question was worth 70 points or none at all. One student found it hard to think of seven, however he wrote the following: 1) It is a perfect formula for the child, 2) It provides immunity against several diseases, 3) It is always the right temperature, 4) It is inexpensive, 5) It bonds child to mother and vice versa, 6) It is always available as needed. Then the student was stuck! Finally, just before the bell rang, he wrote, 7) It comes in two attractive containers and is high enough off the ground where the cat can’t get it! Yep, he passed!
That’s it for the week my friends … do good deeds, be kind and hug those you love! Aloha, a hui hou.