Last week I promised a “special one” for all you ladies, so here goes! Finally they are making a Barbie that women can relate to: Hot Flash Barbie! Just press Barbie’s bellybutton and watch her face turn beet red while tiny drops of perspiration appear on her forehead. It comes with a handheld fan and tinny tissues. And there’s Post-Menopausal Barbie. This Barbie has embarrassing moments when she sneezes, forgets where she puts things and cries a lot! She is sick and tired of Ken sitting on the couch watching football or basketball, so she is holding the clicker. This one comes with Depends and Kleenex, and as a bonus this year only, the book “Getting In Touch With Your Inner Self” is included. A deal!
Last week I promised a “special one” for all you ladies, so here goes! Finally they are making a Barbie that women can relate to: Hot Flash Barbie! Just press Barbie’s bellybutton and watch her face turn beet red while tiny drops of perspiration appear on her forehead. It comes with a handheld fan and tinny tissues. And there’s Post-Menopausal Barbie. This Barbie has embarrassing moments when she sneezes, forgets where she puts things and cries a lot! She is sick and tired of Ken sitting on the couch watching football or basketball, so she is holding the clicker. This one comes with Depends and Kleenex, and as a bonus this year only, the book “Getting In Touch With Your Inner Self” is included. A deal!
Overheard in the dressing room of a chic clothing store, mother to daughter. “Dear, if you are going to pad your bra with Kleenex, take them out of the box first!” Couple more ladies?
Sign on a new restaurant in town: “Welcome to PMS Diner!” Our special today is Hershey Bar Lasagna. That comes with M&M soup, mashed Snickers and hot fudge gravy!
For you medical people: Overheard in the operating room, “Nurse, quick, get on the Internet, go to Surgery.com, scroll down and click on “Are you totally Lost.com!” And some for you parents: A young girl was sent home sick from school one day. Her mother was pregnant. Once she got home she whined to her mom, “I think I caught your morning sickness!” … A dad asked his kindergartner when she got home from school, “What was your test on today?” She responded with a smile, “Paper!” One more? One afternoon a mom spent some time with her daughter shooting hoops of basketball. When the dad got home from work and asked his daughter what she did that day, she responded, “I did shots with Mommy!”
Why did the rabbits go on strike? They thought they deserved a better celery! (Yep, some more!) At a job interview, a woman filled her glass of water until it overflowed a little. “Nervous?” asked the man interviewing her. She replied, “No, I always give 110 percent.” (Yep, she got the job!) One more? Little Henry is sitting at the dinner table. He reaches for his plate, picks up a chicken leg and starts to eat. His mother says, “Henry, did you wash your hands?” Henry replies, “No! I don’t want my chicken to taste like soap, Mom!” … Time to close with one more from a school experience …
When a young man graduated high school, he had to give a speech. He began by reading from a prepared text. “I want to talk about my mother and the wonderful influence she has had on my life,” he told the audience. “She is a shinning example of parenthood, and I love her more than words could ever do justice!” At this point he seemed to struggle for words. After a pause, he looked up with a sly grin and said, “Sorry, but it’s really hard to read my mother’s handwriting!”
Have a fabulous week. Do kind deeds, clean up your neighborhood and above all, LOL … LOL!