Dear Annie: I am a college senior, graduating in May. I am currently undertaking two internships, and one of them will include a job offer when a position opens up. But I don’t know if I should take it. Dear
Dear Annie: I am a college senior, graduating in May. I am currently undertaking two internships, and one of them will include a job offer when a position opens up. But I don’t know if I should take it.
I have always had a passionate desire to live in Europe. Since childhood, I have never wanted anything so much. Last year, I studied abroad in England, and it only made me more determined to go back.
The internship job is terrific. I’d love the position, and it’s also possible there will be an opportunity to go to Europe as part of the program now and then. Or, I could chase my dreams and move to Ireland after graduation. I have found a one-year work-abroad program for recent graduates there.
My parents think going to Ireland would be a mistake. They are worried I won’t find a job or a place to live. Their disapproval makes my decision so much harder, but, Annie, if I don’t go now, I might miss the only opportunity I will ever have to do it.
People always postpone their dreams for the sake of practicality and then realize too late they never had the courage to live the life they imagined. Please help me decide whether to follow my head or my heart. — Head in the Clouds
Dear Head: A job is important, and the one you are looking at is a good one. But this year is likely to be the best (if not only) opportunity you will have to spend a year in a foreign country. It’s also possible the internship position will not “open up” for another six months or more. We think you should go to Ireland. But we also suggest discussing it with your current employer and asking whether the available position will still be around when you return. If they can be accommodating, it would satisfy your “dream,” as well as your parents’.
Dear Annie: My brother has always been a selfish, self-centered person, but since our mother died, he has gotten much worse. He constantly insults his siblings, has stolen property from our mother’s home and has ostracized himself from everyone (including lifetime buddies) with the exception of his wife and kids.
Events that happened to me he now claims happened to him. One of the items he stole was a sports trophy I won as a teenager. He will not return it, and he tells everyone he won it. He displays it in his china cabinet.
Is he grieving? Bipolar? We have almost given up on him but would like your advice. — Unhappy Siblings
Dear Siblings: We don’t know what is wrong with your brother. If he truly believes the things he claims, it indicates mental illness. The death of a parent can send a borderline personality off the edge. Can you speak to his wife? Has she noticed her husband’s behavior is more extreme or unusual than before? If so, please urge her to get help for him.
Annie’s Mailbox is written by Kathy Mitchell and Marcy Sugar, longtime editors of the Ann Landers column. Email questions to anniesmailbox@comcast.net, or write to: Annie’s Mailbox, c/o Creators Syndicate, 737 3rd St., Hermosa Beach, CA 90254. To find out more about Annie’s Mailbox and read features by other Creators Syndicate writers and cartoonists, visit creators.com.
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